If you’ve ever had to deal with a friend that’s down, then you know that the best remedy for that is telling funny stories. That’s the reason why it’s important to have at least one funny story stored in your head. You never know when you’re going to need one.
There’s no shortage of funny short stories online. But if you’re looking for the best funny stories to tell your friend, then you’ve come to the right place.
In this post, we’re rounding up every funny story we’ve found online that you can easily share with friends and family.
If you’re new in school, you can tell these to other students. You can share these with parents who have a great sense of humor. They can also work on your brother or sister. It’s really up to you who you’d like to share these funny stories with. It doesn’t have to be a friend.
Funny Story 1: We’re Just Roommates
A mom made plans to have dinner with Andy, her son, to see his new place. When she got there, she was surprised to learn that his son was living with a girl named Jess. And while Jess was nice, the mom had a suspicion that there was something more going on between the two.
After dinner, Jess stepped out for some air. The mom took the opportunity to talk to Andy about his living situation. But before she could even say a word, her son looked at her and said:
“I know what you’re thinking. We’re just roommates.”
And so the mom let it go and did not say anything further.
A week has passed since the dinner and everything was going well. However, Jess noticed that some of the silverware is missing. She looked all over the kitchen but couldn’t find them. Confused, she asked Andy if he knows anything about it. He didn’t.
Jess said that the silverware went missing after Andy’s mom visited. So Andy texted his mom to get to the bottom of things.
“Mom. I know you’re not the kind that steals silverware. And I’m not saying you did. But our silverware had been missing for a week now. And you’re the only one who’s been here.”
Within minutes, his mom replied:
“Son. I know you’re not the type of person who sleeps with his roommate. And I’m not saying you do. But if your roommate has been sleeping in her own bed she would have known that the silverware was underneath the sheets. Love you.”
Funny Story 2: Slappy the Robot
A man bought a robot called Slappy and bought it home to his wife and kids. The family thought the robot was cool. But what dad didn’t tell them is that the robot is programmed to slap anyone who says a lie.
So he tried the robot on one of his kids.
“It’s the first week of school. Tell me. Did you and your brother go to school today?”
His kid said yes. But Slappy raised its hand and slapped the kid in the face. Dad was impressed.
“You can’t lie to me. This robot slaps anyone that lies.” Dad turned his attention to the younger brother. “Tell me. Where did you go today?”
The younger kid replied, “To a friend’s house.” The robot didn’t slap him. So he must be telling the truth, the dad thought.
The first boy replied, “We were watching cartoons.” But the robot slapped him again. The father, laughing hysterically, asked “What were you really doing?”
“We were watching a dirty movie.” the first kid confessed.
The father, now outraged, yelled at both his children. “How dare you! When I was your age, I wouldn’t even dare think of watching dirty movies.”
Slappy turned around and slapped the father in the face.
His wife, who saw and heard everything, couldn’t stop laughing. She looked his husband in the eyes and said to him:
“Are you really surprised? They’re just like you. I mean, they are your sons after all.”
That’s when Slappy turned to mom and slapped her in the face.
Funny Story 3: Route 22
On a country road, a cop was monitoring traffic when a car full of senior ladies caught his attention. The vehicle they were in was moving way too slowly. The drivers behind them were reaching their limit and about to lose their patience.
The cop decided to pull over the car full of old ladies so that others could pass. He approached the car to talk to the driver.
But before he could say a word, the driver asked the cop:
“I didn’t do anything, did I? I wasn’t speeding at all.”
The cop explained that she wasn’t speeding. However, driving too slowly can be a problem too because it’s inconsiderate to the other cars behind them.
The driver, looking shocked, told the officer that she wasn’t driving slowly at all.
“Officer, I was driving at the speed limit. I made sure I stayed at 22 miles per hour just like the sign says.” The old lady then points to a sign along the road. The cop bursts with laughter and says:
“Ma’am. That’s not the speed limit. That’s the route we’re in. We’re on Route 22.”
“Oh, that explains it.”, says the driver.
The cop asks, “Explains what?”
The old lady points to the passengers. Each one of them looked pale. Not one of them spoke.
The cop, extremely curious, asked the driver what happened. She replied:
“Well, don’t mind them too much. They should be fine in a few minutes. We just got off Route 119.”
Funny Story 4: Predicting the Future
A young man named Jason was listening to his daughter pray as he tucked her in for the night. Her daughter didn’t do or say anything unusual, except for one thing. As she was ending the prayer, she said “God bless mom, dad, and grandma. Goodbye, grandpa.”
Curious, her dad asked why she said goodbye to grandpa. She said that she didn’t know why but that she felt like she had to.
Jason didn’t give it any more thought and went to bed.
The next day, the family received word that grandpa just passed away. Everyone was extremely disappointed when they heard the news. Jason remembered what his little girl said the night before. “What a crazy coincidence.”, he thought.
Several months had passed and Jason found himself tucking in his child again. This time, she ended her prayer with “God bless mom and dad. Goodbye, grandma.”
Jason felt uneasy hearing that but he didn’t bother asking why his child said it. He went straight to bed.
The next morning, the family was told that grandma had passed away. “This can’t be a coincidence anymore, right?”, Jason asked himself. “My daughter is predicting the future.”
And so Jason would listen in on his daughter’s prayers hoping to get some clue as to what’s going to happen soon.
For the longest time, everything seemed normal. His daughter never said anything concerning. Until one day, Jason heard the words that he long feared.
“God bless mom. Goodbye, dad.”
Jason wasn’t able to sleep. And when he got out of bed that next morning, he was like a little boy that didn’t know what to do. His life flashed before his eyes. Still, he got dressed and went to work.
At work, he couldn’t get any job done. The man walked like there was no tomorrow. He truly felt that this day was going to be his last. He was so scared that he didn’t take any risks. He skipped lunch because he didn’t want to tempt fate while waiting in a long line. And when it was time to go home, he stayed in the office.
It was only after the clock struck midnight that he was able to breathe easy again.
Jason packed up his things and went home. He was greeted by his wife who opened the front door. She asked him why did it take so long to get home. Jason said, “I don’t want to hear it. It’s been a rough day.”
His wife replied, “Tell me about it. Our pool boy died today.”
Why You Need Funny Stories
Telling funny stories is not only a good way of making friends but keeping them too.
Whether you’re attending a birthday party, having recently switched schools, or looking for new best friends, you can share funny short stories to break the ice. They’re a good excuse to talk to people.
Is it your first day at work? Telling funny short stories during your lunch break can ease whatever tension you’re feeling.
Funny short stories work whether you’re in fifth grade playing with other kids or in your fifties playing with your grandkids. And they’re possibly the best stories you can tell to form bonds with your best friend, just like an inside joke.
When you’re in need of a good laugh or know someone that does, then don’t forget to share funny short stories.