Have you ever been a victim of bullying in school?
Sucks, doesn’t it? It makes you feel terrible, and it negatively affects you for the rest of your life.
But while it’s unfortunate to be a victim of bullies, let this sink in: You can gain valuable lessons from the experience.
So in this article, let’s talk about bullying stories in school. And let’s also discuss why you should tell someone, the lessons that come with these stories, and more.
Why tell someone about bullying stories in middle school and high school
According to the Center for Educational Statistics, only one out of five students report being bullied. Many victims of bullying don’t report incidents of bullying because they don’t even recognize the act of bullying. Others also think that reporting the incidents will only take too much work and won’t help at all.
You need to change this. While telling parents or adults about incidents of bullying can be hard, you need to find the courage to do it.
Here are the reasons why most victims don’t tell someone they’re getting bullied:
- Worries about making bullying incidents worse – It’s a natural response of a teacher or parent to get mad at the bully and protect the victim. The victims shouldn’t worry about this because if adults get mad, it’s because of the bully’s actions — and never theirs.
- The fear that the bullies will retaliate – If a victim speaks up, there’s a chance the bully will make their life worse and bully them more often. What they don’t know is there’s also a much better chance that the bullying won’t happen ever again.
- Embarrassment – The victims of bullying may think of themselves as powerless and weak, and they worry that telling someone will make that person think of them the same way. They shouldn’t worry about this because as long as they tell a reliable teacher or any adult, these more mature people will know better than to think less of the victims.
- Worries about getting labeled as a snitch – Being labelled a snitch, tattletale, and rat can sometimes be more terrible for the victims than the incident of bullying itself. The solution is to approach a reliable adult and express this concern.
Now, here are the reasons why you should tell someone about bullying:
- You can overcome the fear of being bullied – Many people will be on your side. You don’t have to feel like you’re all alone.
- You can stop bullying – Bullies tend to stop their habit when someone tells on them. They put an end to their actions right away because they don’t want people to gossip about them or analyze their behavior.
- You can perform better in school – Want to skip lessons in school because you’re afraid of crossing paths with your bully? Instead of doing that, go to your parents, teachers, or other reliable adults and ask them to look out for you.
- You can save someone’s life – If bullies stop their horrible actions because you told on them, someone out there will be grateful to you. Because being a bully’s victim negatively affects a person long-term, you can even be among the reasons they have a good future.
Bullied into a wiser, stronger, and more successful person
This true story about bullying details the school days of Winona Ryder — a celebrated personality who emerged a wiser, stronger, and more successful person because of her unfortunate experience in school.
The story starts when Winona was in high school. Back then, she was too skinny that other girls found her uncomfortable to be around. Because of this, she was hardly ever invited to group activities, out-of-school parties, and other fun social gatherings.
One girl, in particular, gave her a hard time. She bullied little Winona into thinking her skinny frame made her abnormal. She also made Winona think that because she was skinny, she can’t ever be friends with her group and other people.
So Winona went through her years in school thinking exactly that — that she didn’t deserve to be friends with everyone else. She walked the hallways alone and experienced a life of solitude.
At a young age, she didn’t know better and didn’t think better. For her (back then), she deserved to be alone.
But years after she left school, that changed. She focused on building herself. And because of her dedication to her growth, she succeeded. She built a life she could be proud of.
So one day, when she received a call to come to her high school’s reunion, she was in bliss. She was happy to get an invite. And she wanted to show the people she went to school with that she was doing really well.
But while she felt tempted to rub her fame and fortune in people’s faces and confront her bully during the reunion, she chose to be the bigger person. She chose to carry on — satisfied with her place in life.
Lessons you can learn from being a victim of bullying
Like the story above, you have a choice to use your experience with bullying for the better. Like the victim above, you can also use it to be wiser, stronger, and more successful.
Here are more lessons you can take away from being a victim of bullying:
Always stand up for yourself
Bullies often remain as bullies because nobody stands up to them. And their target is somebody they can intimidate easily.
Here are the ways on how to stand up for yourself:
- Respond, not react – Be rational. Weigh your actions carefully before you do them.
- Use silence – Silence is powerful. So do your best to ignore a bully’s actions.
- Be intentional – Directly tell a bully to stop their bad actions. And let them know how you feel.
- Focus on standing up for yourself – Avoid the urge to insult them. Don’t call them names, too.
Don’t mind what other people say
People will always have something to say. They’ll praise or criticize you, and they may even gossip about you. Listening to them will only frustrate you.
Here are the ways on how to not mind what other people say:
- Be a friend to yourself – Practice self-compassion and selective listening. Only listen to words that can help you.
- Identify positive people – Surround yourself with those who cheer for your growth. And let go of anyone not bringing value into your life.
- Remind yourself of the truth – Some people speak words only to distract you. Eliminate that kind of distraction and pay attention to what’s true.
- Find a new hobby – It needs to be good for you physically and mentally. Distract yourself for the better — by being more productive.
Don’t let the experience change you for the worst
It can be effortless to let bullies win over you. And it’s not uncommon to feel like crying, yelling, and whining after an experience with a bully. But be brave enough to stop feeling bad and find it in your heart to carry on.
Here are the ways on how not to let being bullied change you for the worst:
- Find the silver lining – For example, did you learn karate or another martial art so you can defend yourself from bullies? Focus on that!!
- Be wise – Make better actions and decisions. And if you see someone getting bullied, help out.
- Remember, your current situation is temporary – Being bullied is awful. But 5 or so years later, you’ll find yourself in a different situation.
- Achieve great things – Don’t let being a victim of bullying define you. Instead of overthinking, use the experience as a driving force and set new heights.
Accept your unique character
You need to be confident in who you are. It’s important to remember this if you feel like you’re different from a group of people. And you need to remember there’s nothing wrong with it.
Here are the ways on how to be okay with being different:
- Use your unique strengths – There are things you can do that can easily outshine other people. Because you’re different, you can accomplish certain tasks faster and better.
- Be irreplaceable – You’re one and only, and barely anyone can take your place. This gives you an edge in class, sports, and other fields.
- Be realistic – Be authentic, be honest, and have integrity. If you act according to your true nature, others — especially those like you — will be drawn to you.
- See things in a creative perspective – Some problems can’t be solved by ordinary logic. Because you’re different, you can contribute a creative and out-of-the-box solution.
Conclusion: What to do with your story
Being a victim of bullying is bad. Whether you’re in elementary school, middle school, or high school, it feels terrible. But do your best to rise above and always be the bigger person than the bullies.
As much as you want to, you can’t change how they are. What you can change, however, is how you are and how you respond to unfortunate situations.
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