Do you get frustrated so easily if something doesn’t happen the way you want?
Then it looks like you have a problem, and you need to resolve it. Instead of asking yourself the same question, “Why do I get frustrated so easily?” over and over, act on the problem.
In this article, let’s break down the causes of your frustrations. This way, you can control your emotions better.
Why do I get frustrated so easily?
Frustration is a response to a problem left unexpressed, unresolved, and unacknowledged. You get frustrated because you feel helpless. You find yourself out of control.
You scratch your head out of frustration because you can’t do anything about it. As much as you want to solve a problem, the solution to that problem is out of your hands.
A simple and relatable example is the frustration of working remotely nowadays. Your problem is you lack the technical finesse to set up a workstation to maximize your productivity.
If you accept this situation as is, it’s understandable you’re frustrated.
Want to stop getting frustrated at this problem? Do something about it — hire professionals or teach yourself everything you need to know.
If there’s a will, there should be a way!
Why do I get frustrated so easily? A mental health issue
Getting frustrated so easily is a sign of a mental health issue — particularly, an anxiety disorder.
Here are mental health issues associated with getting frustrated so easily:
This refers to an intense fear of rejection and/or negative evaluation in social situations. You may have this if you worry too much about how other people see you.
People with the disorder are paranoid that they’ll be shut down if they make any effort. For example, they think someone won’t talk to them in a formal gathering. So they won’t bother showing up.
Someone without the disorder will attend the gathering. And they won’t mind if others won’t talk to them.
Living in fear you’re about to experience extreme discomfort for no reason? Find things frustrating because you feel they’re about to set you off?
You have this disorder.
People with a panic disorder are always afraid — yes, even if there’s nothing to be afraid of. For example, they’re afraid of ants. As a result, they avoid anything sugary and would obsessively clean their spaces.
Meanwhile, a person without the disorder may also be afraid of ants. However, they’ve accepted that coming into contact with ants is a possibility.
A need to do things repeatedly without regard for consequences isn’t mentally healthy. It results in frustration if you fail to accomplish things in an exact order.
People with obsessive-compulsive disorder want things arranged a particular way. For example, they set something straight the moment they notice it’s out of place or isn’t symmetrical to the other things in a pack.
Meanwhile, people without this disorder wouldn’t mind if something is out of place. They’ll carry on with their lives instead of obsessing over the matter.
Overly happy one minute, feelings of hopelessness the next? One minute you curse non-stop with the inability to control your anger, the next you don’t feel like uttering a single word?
It seems you have severe mood changes and you’re dealing with this disorder.
People who are bipolar have manic episodes of high and low times. For example, they change their mind about an outfit too many times. For them, they don’t look attractive enough and associate their attractiveness to the outfit they’re about to wear.
People without the disorder, on the other hand, would be satisfied with whatever outfit they currently have on.
Borderline personality disorder
This disorder leads to impulsivity and intense emotional responses.
People with a borderline personality disorder have a difficult time managing almost any emotional response. For instance, they tend to feel deeply affected and depressed at the sight of a motherless child. What they witnessed messed with them in a way they can’t function normally anymore.
Meanwhile, people without this disorder will have tamed and normal responses. They’ll feel sad, but they’ll carry on with their lives and remain functional throughout the day.
Related post: What Does It Mean If You Get Frustrated Easily?
Suffering from a severe case of one (at least) of these mental health issues?
Don’t wait for your condition to worsen. Instead, seek treatment before it progresses and becomes out of your control. Start by recognizing the symptoms like:
Are you quick to leave matters unsolved at the subtlest sign of failure?
Some things don’t happen as soon — and as well you want. Find peace with the truth that some things take time.
Feel as if you can’t count on people because they screwed up in a small way?
Before dismissing anybody, think of whether it’s you who can’t relay instructions effectively.
Easily angered for no obvious reason? And it’s as if getting angry is an immediate reaction?
If so, you need to calm down. Wait for things to work out before you react.
Are you biased? Do you dislike something for no obvious reason?
Before you jump to conclusions, check your facts. Not doing so works against you. It also works against your better judgment.
If you don’t see or judge things reasonably, you’ll get frustrated alright.
Find yourself indecisive over almost everything?
It’s a symptom you need to fix. That mindset needs to change because making decisions is how you level up in life.
Why do I get frustrated easily? Understanding the causes
Once you have telltale symptoms, consult with a medical professional you believe can help you best. Fill this doctor in on the situation, along with how you expect them to help you.
Here are the common causes of frustration:
Here’s the deal: Bottled-up emotions will find their way out sooner or later — and in unexpected situations. They carry weight and if this weight becomes unbearable, they’ll explode.
So be it an anger problem, irrational fear, or petty irritation, you need to express what’s on your mind. Yes, even minor issues you deem unimportant.
It’s even a healthy approach, says a study spearheaded by psychologists from the University of Rochester and Harvard.
Here are simple things you can do to express your emotions:
- Identify the cause of your emotions – No matter how painful it is to admit, you need to acknowledge what’s causing you to feel particular emotions. Be honest with yourself and accept you react and/or are sensitive to some things.
- Speak up – Don’t like it when kids make odd faces in public? How about when someone just enters your home uninvited? Say what you need to say. Every time you dislike something, express it to keep the act from getting repeated.
- Talk freely to someone trustworthy – Wondering why problematic people will pay big bucks to talk to a respectable therapist? That’s because talking is therapeutic and helps you deal with emotional wounds. If you can’t afford a therapist, find someone you can trust 100% and tell them about what’s bothering you.
- Write in a journal – Don’t know anyone trustworthy? Or don’t want to talk to someone? Write your feelings instead.
- Use your emotions for good – Write a story, draw a picture, play music — any creative activity — is great for dealing with emotions. The logic here? It stimulates your brain and grants better control of analytical thinking, abstract ideas, and attention.
- Take solitary walks – Not only does this science-backed method count as physical exercise. It’s also an excellent way of inviting uninterrupted self-reflection, clear thoughts, and calmness.
George Bernard Shaw, an Irish playwright and political activist, once said:
“The single biggest problem
in communication is the illusion that
it has taken place.”
Often — if not all the time, miscommunication is worse than not having any communication. That’s because you’re relaying information that’s clearly false.
One mis-communicated message can send major and irrevocable problems your way. And if you keep this up, your credibility and think low of you — among the other dangers of miscommunication.
Want to avoid miscommunication? These ways will help you:
- Be a great listener – Invest effort in what the person talking to you has to say. Don’t interrupt them for the sake of having something to say.
- Think, don’t speak immediately – Leave out any irrelevant information. Rather than speak freely, choose your words wisely.
- Don’t assume – If something’s not clear to you, ask. Pretending you know something when you don’t is a surefire approach to getting terrible results.
- Be clear with your instructions – Don’t let the other person assume, too. Make time for them to ask questions. And address these questions well.
- Command attention – Let the other person listen to what you have to say. If they get distracted, grab their attention again.
- Understand the limitations of certain communication channels – Using text, chat, and/or email? Know that you can’t always elaborate on your points using these channels. Therefore, and if need be, follow up.
Lack of confidence
To succeed in different aspects of life, you need to have a positive attitude and a great perception of yourself. Without confidence, it’s hard to succeed in life. And it’s a cause of frustration.
So be confident. Confidence in your abilities, in your self-worth, and in your pursuits in life paves the path for better days.
Unfortunately, though, it’s possible to confuse confidence with arrogance. Confidence is about uplifting yourself without putting someone down.
Here are tips on how to polish your confidence:
- Talk only if necessary – Heard the saying “Empty cans make loud noises”? Sometimes, an indication a person lacks confidence is in their insistence to talk incessantly.
- Apologize only if necessary – Don’t say sorry for anything unless you’re clearly at fault. If you’re late to a scheduled meeting, for example, apologize.
- Think long-term – Don’t settle for small wins that could get you by for a week or less. Instead, strategize and delay gratifications for enormous and much better possibilities.
- Show emotional intelligence – Empathize and work on your relationships — professional or otherwise.
- Be respectful – Understand that not everybody will like you, and you need to accept that. Give someone space, if that’s what they’re asking from you.
- Handle rejections gracefully – Understand that not everybody will like your actions — despite having genuinely good intentions.
Lack or loss of interest
Is your heart not 100% set on chasing after something? Then don’t go after it — a practical course of action.
Insisting otherwise is a counterproductive behavior that leads to frustration. Not to mention apathy and a waste of time.
Plus, assure yourself it’s okay to reconsider a pursuit. It’s okay to change your mind about something.
What’s not okay is engaging in something unwillingly.
However, sometimes you don’t have to drop matters totally. Maybe all you need is a dose of motivation to remind yourself why you got into something in the first place.
Here are ways you can refuel your interests:
- Take breaks – Weeks, months, or years — it’s up to you. It gives you time to think and fresh perspectives.
- Make plans – Strategize what you’ll be doing. Ensure your plan’s realistic so you can set it in motion.
- Think about the alternative – What will you be doing instead? Will it make you happy for a long time?
- Be honest with yourself – Explore your reasons for giving up on an interest. Maybe you need to fix those reasons.
- Do things differently – It’s possible you’re bored — not having lost interest per se. Therefore, think of new, radical, and clever approaches.
- Talk to like-minded people – Need to vent? Then talk to someone who can relate and maybe share ways around the tasks that frustrate you.
Conflict of interests
Having multiple interests also causes frustration. Because you haven’t decided which interest is more meaningful, you halfheartedly engage in a task — and not go knee-deep into it.
The result of half-hearted intentions? That side of you that wants you to do more for one of your interests will emerge. And it’ll fight with that other side that also wants you to do more for another interest.
It also leaves you vulnerable to confusion. You introduce yourself to more concepts than you can handle. And it comes down to the point where you don’t know what you truly want anymore.
So work on this cause of frustration and check out these ways to resolve conflict:
- Agree to look ahead – Interest in past undertakings only because of some fond memories is impractical and will cause you to lose interest in them soon. So leave them behind and set your mind to achieving futuristic goals.
- Reevaluate – Weigh the pros and cons of all your interests. And go with one that brings you the most perks.
- Be objective – Think rationally and strategize. Drop interests you don’t see yourself pursuing for the long haul.
- Compromise – To focus on one area of interest, leave out some things. Figure out less important activities and give them up.
- Prioritize – Don’t want to give up on some interests after thorough thinking? Then don’t, but to resolve the matter, you need to prioritize.
- Delegate – If you can’t prioritize, ask for help. Find someone qualified — someone you can count on to take over for you.
If someone approaches you and asks the same question that bothered you: “Why do I get frustrated so easily?”, they’re in luck because you’re able to help.
Tell them to check out this article, for starters. Then walk them through the process of identifying their frustration’s cause. And help them with their next course of action.
Note: This post is not meant to be a medical evaluation of your mental state. Please consult with your doctor and seek professional help.